Well... it's happened. I have become my mother. I swore I would never say the things she said or require the same things of my children that she did. And, here I am finding, myself spewing the same commands, rules, boundaries and expectations to my stepson. "Do your homework," "this is not your house, it is a residence provided for you by the Lord until you get your own," "Because I said so," "Go to bed," "Get up," "Take out the trash," "Clean your room," "I am not responsible for your friends. I am responsible for you." Outside of the above statements I have heard myself recite almost word for word disortations on life to my stepson, Jacob. I was like, "Lord! Seriously?! Come on! I swore I would not be like this." I know in my heart that my discipline is correct. Everything my mom taught and told me was truth. I was fortunate to have a wise mom. And, I am not alone in that.
Proverbs 31 is known among believers for the passage on the "Wife of Noble Character." In various versions of the Bible she is called the virtuous woman or excellent wife. This proverb are the words of King Lemuel, an oracle learned from his mother. In this oracle, King Lemuel recites other words of advice his mother gave him. She taught him to stay away from drinking much wine, how to rule, how to treat the needy, poor and those who cannot help themselves.
I know it's not mother's day, but a mom somewhere out there needs to here this today. To the mom's who fear the Lord and acknowledge that our children are gifts from God, know that He chose you to be the parent of your children. The wisdom you have is supposed to be passed on. We have the priviledge of partnering with God to equip our children to be part of His magnificent tapestry. So, as you spew and endure the rolling of the eyes, shrugging of shoulders, stomps out of the room, tears of disagreement and talking back; your words will stick. And you will witness the manifestation of Proverbs 22:6 "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."
Anonymous -
ReplyDeleteYou are absoulutely correct! Thank you for your addition. My son is not provoked to wrath. He is a typical teen ager that does not like to do his chores and attempts role reversal.
However, there are some parents who are afraid to tell their child right from wrong and give the instruction necessary for living and flying into their destiny. As a child development specialist, it amazes me to hear parents refuse to tell their child, "No," explaining in love why some decisions are not wise and the purpose of the rules.
I appeal for discipline in love without fear of losing the love of your child. This is a healthy balance. Thank you for your comment and I hope you visit again.
God Bless You,
Lisa
My dear daughter Lisa--I am humbled and honored by what you have posted here. As a Christian Mom and a child development specialist, I also benefitted from wise, loving, principled discipline from my parents. I marvel at them and their wisdom as teen parents from a very rural, southern community-who went on to earn their own advanced college degrees and raise 6 children all of whom except one went on to become strong Christians, get their education, have loving,marital relationships that have stood the test of time, and successful careers. We enjoyed the blessing of favor by following the not only the love that Christ preached but the discipline outlined by our Heavenly Father. I was never confused about my role as a parent--never once thought I needed to be my child's friend, for I clearly understood that your friends and peers were an important element in your life and that my role as your Mom would be compromised if I ever got confused about parenting and friendship with you. As adults we now have so many bonds as Mother-daughter, Christians, and yes, friends. I love you Lisa--what a blessing you have been to your Dad and I and so many others. May God continue to bless you in all that you do.
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